Thursday, July 19, 2012

Back off of NANCY GRACE


Toni Medrano, a 29 year old alcoholic, committed suicide by dowsing herself with a flammable fluid and setting herself on fire one month after being dubbed “Vodka Mom” by Nancy Grace.  According to the Daily Mail, the young mother consumed an entire fifth of vodka, then fell asleep and suffocated her 3 week old son Adrian.  It wasn’t until 10:30 am the next morning, when she saw that Adrian was cold and purple, did she realize she had killed her newborn son.

Initially Ms. Medrano faced 2 counts of manslaughter. One charge was for “Culpable negligence creating unreasonable risk,” and a second for “Committing or attempting to commit a violation.” If convicted on both counts she could have faced up to10 years in prison.

The tragic story of newborn Adrian’s asphyxia was featured on the Nancy Grace’s syndicated talk show. On the show Nancy reveals that Ms. Medrano consumed the equivalent of 17 shots of vodka and that her alcohol level was .11.  A doctor on the show further revealed that little Adrian had probably been dead for hours due to the purple coloring in his skin, which is a sign that his blood had been pooling in his body.  Which means that his blood was unable to circulate because of the amount of force on his body. This in and of itself caused this poor child an immeasurable amount of pain on top of the pain of suffocation.

Outraged by the sheer neglect of this infant child, Nancy pointed out that Ms. Medrano had a history of alcohol abuse and had been cited with two Driving While Intoxicated (DWI) offenses. She then adamantly called for Ms. Medrano to be charged with Murder One, which is a charge of premeditated murder.  Although I don’t agree with Ms. Medrano being charged with Murder One, I don’t see anything wrong or inappropriate with the actions of Nancy Grace.  As angry as some people have been because Nancy called out Ms. Medrano on her actions and responsibilities as a parent, where was this anger at the horrific loss of an innocent child?

I strongly don’t believe Nancy Grace said anything that any person with some semblance of rational thought wasn’t thinking. It's tragic on all accounts, but that woman should have thought about the possible consequences when she “boozed it up” and fell asleep with her 3 week old on the couch. Where was the child’s crib?  If she couldn’t afford a crib, then she could have put him in a drawer, but she didn’t need to have him on the couch with her when she decided to “get her drink on.”  With that being said, she didn't deserve to set herself on fire and die in the manner she did, but I'm sure being suffocated and crushed is no walk in the park either. Little Adrian should have been her number one priority. Period. She may have been distraught after the fact, but that doesn't bring her son back and killing herself only exacerbates the issues her other children will have in the future.

There are some that are calling for Nancy Grace’s resignation.  Others are calling for the boycott of CNN and even Dancing with the Stars; at which I find absolutely ridiculous. What if Ms. Medrano had she been drinking and got into a car and killed someone other than her own child?  What if that child had been some else’s 3 week old? I bet those that defend her would probably have a difference of opinion. Is it because she killed her own child that she should somehow warrant public compassion? Before she took her first drink shouldn’t she have had the rationalization to put her newborn in his crib?  How about, “common sense”?  I understand that some people may not have “good sense,” but most people have “common sense.”

Alcoholism is a disease as is drug addiction, “yadda, yadda, yadda.” Let it affect you, your body, and your own circumstances. On the other hand, when you kill innocent people based on a "choice," get ready for the consequences. It would have been entirely different if the killing were completely accidental or unavoidable.  Had Ms. Medrano been sober when the accident happened we’re be talking about a different scenario with a different set of empathetic circumstances; but she wasn’t. She was “fu@k#d up!” She was so out of her mind that she laid on top of her child for hours before she realized she had killed him. It’s tragic on all accounts, but she gets no sympathy from me. 

I can’t understand how people can get so angry at Nancy Grace, but not so much at the fact that an innocent child is no longer here and the remaining children are motherless because Ms. Medrano made the decision to make two selfish choices. It's not Nancy Grace's fault that the mother had no integrity and would rather dowse herself with fire than face ridicule, a lifetime of remorse and possible jail time. At least she had choices. What choice did the little Adrian have?

If we’re going to get angry at anything, let’s get angry at mothers who make irrational choices at the expenses of their children.  Let’s get angry at fathers who emotionally detach themselves from the responsibility of nurturing their families. Let’s get angry at everyone who continuously chooses and abuses mind altering substances while their household are left to fend or defend for themselves.  Let’s just get seriously angry at unavoidable caustic choices that wreck havoc on our communities!

This woman does not get a pass because she was emotionally weak or a person of color.  Nor does she get a pass because of the horrific way she chose to end her life. I’m tired of all the cookie cutter excuses of being down trodden and drenched in poverty.  Everyone is going through issues.  The economy is horrible; people are losing their jobs, seeing the entire savings being wiped out and their homes being foreclosed.  If your actions are hurting your family and it is within your grasp to make a choice to choose a new direction, then do it!  No more excuses. Period! You don’t have money for rehab? So what!  The rehab facility in your area is filled to capacity?  So what!  The rehab facility recommends that you stay for 3 months? So what!  You do what you need to do to get yourself right for your kids. Period! That’s what a parent is supposed to do and it the right of every child to expect and be entitled to that commitment.  If you make a choice to bring a child into the world, then make a choice to be the best example possible. Period!

What Ms. Medrano did was wrong and I don’t blame Nancy Grace for getting angry.  Some may say that it was all for ratings.  Others may say exploitation.  Still, others may say she was just being a mean, old, belligerent Bi*#h.  I don’t care.  I may not necessarily agree with all her tactics, but for the most part I think she was right on point.

RIP Adrian



  1. I respect ur point of View but I know for a fact in this society that it is hard to get help, a stranger will offer u a drink to forget about ur problem before they offer u a meal to take away ur hunger pain. I believe in God And that means only God should judge, even though this incident is horrible, horrible events happen everyday. Nobody was around to help this woman whrn they knew she had drinking problems so again another example of the whole system failing. R.I.P Adrian if u want to help this angel set up more programs to prevent things like this from happening.

    1. Thank you so much for reading my article and taking the time to post your comment. I understand what you're say, however, when are we going to start taking personal responsibility for our actions?

      There are a lot of programs out there to help people who, for one reason or another, can't help themselves. If budget cuts have affected programs in people's areas then a great alternative is the churches. In most cases they are free.

      There are definitely services out there for people who have a burning desire to change their addictions. That means if services are not available in your area, then you drive, job, walk or crawl to the next area because it's a priority in your life.

      When you make a commitment to your spirit to change, all of the withdrawals of your body are just a sign that you are evolving into a greater person. When you come out on the other side of addiction your mind is stronger and more agile. Unfortunately many addicts don't want to experience the pain it will take in order for them to obtain their life back. It is not easy, but the rewards of sacrifice are humongous.

      As a society we have organized many help centers and clinics. There have been many PSA and advertisements created about the dangers of addiction and people still aren't listening. It's about time someone had the courage to publicly get anger.

      I'm an educator and I see the affects of addiction on families everyday. The are many children growing up with fetal alcohol syndrome and those same children are raising themselves because their parents are drowning. It's sad, but it's definitely avoidable, by making the conscious choice to change.

      Nancy Grace said what many of us were thinking and I for one respect her for it.

  2. Nancy Grace stated an opinion which is her way of thinking I am not stating that Ms. Grace opinion is wrong And neither is ur opinion but both opinion states problems within our communities And the solution that u stated is in our communities...People who use drugs, alcohol And have addiction have physical problems that they can't control if the Community, Hospitals And Churches All worked togethet threw communication then they can decress, educate And strength the community. I am not stating that I don't agree with u or Ms. Grace, it's just a different variety of people in this world And yes losing baby Aiden was a very sad event that could have been avoided how many individuals was aware of the fact that she drinks, And how many ministers, preachers, teachers And doctors go to the home, Check on the Kids And just show an effort. I agree that individuals are responsible for there own actions, but u have to admit drug And alcohol effects ur judgement, but let's not focus on the past, but yet Change our future And keep Baby Aiden memory alive..Ur words are powerful And well spoken use ur powers for good Sir, Stay focused And help African American by providing them with the kbowledge they need to succeed. We are aware of the fact that an African American commit a stupid, harsh crime everyday, but u my Friend have the powers to prevent it...Thank u for ur rapid response, I enjoy ur blog...Keep up thr good work, And as always have a blessed day...

  3. Almost sounds like she had mental health issues and was medicating...but how sad for her baby and her other children. But I do agree with you Aaron and Nancy Grace!


Thank you for taking the time to read my article and post your comment!